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一个人来到饭馆吃早点,侍者端来盘炒蛋

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  • 2021-08-05
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生日前夕,老公问我:“亲爱的,你生日快到了,告诉我,想要什么礼物?”我想了想,回答道:“就买一双肩包吧”我生日那天,只见老公买了两个煎包我靠,好一个“一双煎包”,这王八蛋故意的吧

一个人来到饭馆吃早点,侍者端来盘炒蛋。他吃出这蛋是臭的,于是质问经理;“你们为何给客人吃坏蛋?”经理便对侍者大吼说;“为什么要给客人吃坏蛋?我不是说过,坏蛋只能用来做蛋糕!”

年前,舅妈瞒着给表姐报了一个相亲大会,她誓死不屈。舅妈没办法,果断换了身衣服:我去,丈母娘相女婿,别人也不能说啥!回到家,表姐问舅妈:咋样,有相中的吗?舅妈叹口气说:幸亏没让你去,你看看那些闺女个个水灵,那些小伙个个帅气,估计你去了瞅都没人瞅你一眼…...

小丽回到家里,父母追问恋爱情况。小丽实在办法,拿出宋仲基的照片说“看吧,这就是我男朋友。”她妈看一眼照片,赶紧收起来,把小丽拉到一旁说“孩子你告诉妈这是啥情况,你姐刚才说这是她老公。”

带二岁的女儿在饭馆吃馄饨,吃着吃着,女儿叫了起来:“爸爸快看,蜜蜂。”我看了一眼,对女儿说:“宝贝,那不是蜜蜂,那是苍蝇。”女儿接下来就边看边大声的数了起来:“爸爸你看,一只苍蝇,那边还有,二只苍蝇,三只苍蝇,四只苍蝇......哇,爸爸,好多苍蝇”只见柜台上的老板脸都红了。

公司开会提高员工敬业精神对公司要有主人翁意识,领导在上面问到有没有想过公司为什么会聘用你们? 不知底下谁突然冒出一句“便宜!”气氛顿时不淡定了......

毕业聚会在朋友的起哄下,向女老师表白,没想到她立即打了一个电话,过了半小时,一个男人抱着一个孩子过来,女老师说:“给大家介绍一下,这是我老公和儿子。”我当时连着给自己灌下两瓶啤酒假装喝醉……

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